Is That Drool on my Chin?

Sunday, September 19

Holy Cow!  Okay, I have to admit it .... chemo kinda kicks your ass!  I'm pretty tough, but run like a baby when I'm nauseous.  Go figure..that's the big one here.  I have to be nauseous.  I'll take or do anything not to be nauseous, unfortunately, that explains the lost week!!  I pretty much slept,  I don't know, slept or  just stared into space, but you definitely could find drool on my chin if you looked!  I probably over medicated myself the first two days after chemo, but really...., I wasn't going to run a marathon and my mom wasn't going to let me get out of bed anyway!!
Last time I "blogged" was right after chemo.  I felt good that day and the next.  The shot really stings, but other than that no real complaints.  It's a weird feeling, it's like your waiting to feel really bad, not that you have to, but you know your going to.  I had this battle going on in my head.  On one hand,  I know I'm going to be the person that it doesn't effect.  You remember, the whole super hero wanna be thing....single handily crushed chemo with a glancing blow....Whatever! On the other hand, well, let's make that hand reality.....I've just had a boatload of poison injected into my veins, chances are, I'm probably going to feel it.  I did.
Week one is done.  I'm glad it's over, but I definitely need to do things differently.  My mom and I met with a naturopathic oncologist, Dr Rubin, on Friday and have a plan.  Food seems to be the biggest problem.  Everyone wants you to eat, but I'm definitely not hungry and nothing tastes good.  Actually, cold mashed potatoes are delicious! It's really not important as to how one actually figures out that cold mashed potatoes are good, but trust me they are.  Anything that comes out of a can tastes like worms, other than that it's all a crap shoot.   Everyone reacts differently.  Dr. Rubin recommended Kirstin at Nourish to  help with a meal plan, gave me some supplements and recommendations to help my body deal with the chemo, nausea etc.  And now the reason I Love, Love Dr Rubin is that he recommended I take 3 or 4 weeks off to get my food and exercise program together!  Sweet! Okay, really he just said 3 weeks.  That's what I'm doing.  Lloyd has been awesome about the time off, my mom has been here everyday trying to figure out what to cook and how to help.  Lisa has gone to all my appointments, Terri stops by whenever she can, and Denise flew in from Colorado.  The thing is, there's no instruction manual.  There are great books out there.  My favorite is "My Crazy Sexy Cancer", but we all have to figure out how we're going to deal. I apologize to everyone I've been short with or down right mean to.  We're all doing it right...It's all just different!